The Erma Bombeck Collection

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 9781480430594
Release Date: 2013-05-21
Genre: Humor

Three hilarious books in one from the #1 New York Times–bestselling author on marriage, motherhood, and the absurdities of suburban life. If Life Is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits? is Erma Bombeck’s timelessly witty look at the hidden side of married life. Motherhood captures one of the toughest jobs on earth with humor and heart. The Grass Is Always Greener Over the Septic Tank is Bombeck’s take on the unforgiving frontier of American suburbia.

If Life Is a Bowl of Cherries What Am I Doing in the Pits

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 9781453290101
Release Date: 2013-01-15
Genre: Humor

The hilarious #1 New York Times bestseller: Erma Bombeck’s take on marriage and family life is “fun from cover to cover” (Hartford Courant). Ever since she was a child, Erma Bombeck has been an expert worrier, and married life has only honed that skill. She gets anxious about running out of ball bearings; about snakes sneaking in through the pipes; about making meaningful conversation on New Year’s Eve. Married life, she realizes, is an unpredictable saga even when you know exactly how loud your husband snores every night—and she wouldn’t have it any other way. In this crisp collection of essays, Bombeck shows off the irresistible style that made her one of America’s favorite humorists for more than three decades. When she sharpens her wit, no family member is sacred and no self-help fad is safe. This ebook features an illustrated biography of Erma Bombeck including rare images and never-before-seen documents from the author’s estate.

The Grass Is Always Greener Over the Septic Tank

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 9781453290064
Release Date: 2013-01-15
Genre: Humor

The “marvelously funny” and much-loved humorist explores the perils of suburban living in this New York Times bestseller (Vogue). For years, the Bombecks have heard rumors of a magical land called Suburbia where the air is clean, the grass is trimmed, and children don’t risk getting mugged on their walk to school. After watching their friends flee the city for subdivided utopias like Bonaparte’s Retreat and Mortgage Mañana, Erma and her family load up their belongings and cry, “Station wagons . . . ho!” But life on the suburban frontier is not as perfect as they had hoped. The trees are stunted, the house is cramped, and there’s no grass at all. But the Bombecks will make do, for they are suburbanites now—the last true pioneers! This ebook features an illustrated biography of Erma Bombeck including rare images and never-before-seen documents from the author’s estate.

Four of a Kind

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Bbs Publishing Corporation
ISBN: 088365959X
Release Date: 1996-10-01
Genre: Humor

Together for the first time--the late Erma Bombeck's observations on the hilarious aspects of family life. This four-in-one collection includes The Grass Is Always Greener over the Septic Tank, If Life Is a Bowl of Cherries--What Am I Doing in the Pits?, Aunt Erma's cope book and Motherhood: The Second Oldest Profession.

At Wit s End

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Fawcett
ISBN: 9780307778246
Release Date: 2011-02-02
Genre: Humor

"America's irrepressible doyenne of domestic satire." THE BOSTON GLOBE Madcap, bittersweet humor in classic Erma Bombeck-style. You'll laugh until it hurts and love it! "Any mother with half a skull knows that when Daddy's little boy becomes Mommy's little boy, the kid is so wet, he's treading water. What do you mean you're a participle in the school play and you need a costume? Those rotten kids. If only they'd let me wake up in my own way. Why do they have to line up along my bed and stare at me like Moby Dick just washed up onto a beach somewhere?"

Aunt Erma s Cope Book

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 9781453290071
Release Date: 2013-01-15
Genre: Humor

The #1 New York Times bestseller about one woman’s doomed quest for self-improvement by a writer “blessed with the comic equivalent of perfect pitch” (The Boston Globe). As far as Erma can tell, her life is going well. Her children speak to her, her husband smiles at her, and she’s capable of looking in a mirror without screaming. But her friends know better. No matter how happy Erma thinks she is, she’s in need of help, and the only way to fulfillment is a ten-foot stack of self-improvement books. From Sensual Needlepoint to Fear of Buying, Erma will try them all. One book recommends bringing roleplay into the bedroom, so she dresses up in her son’s football pads. She tries to meditate but gets stuck in the lotus position. She spends more time in the kitchen but only succeeds in melting her son’s retainer. No matter how hard she tries to improve her family life, her schemes keep backfiring. As she soon learns, you may not always be able to fix what’s not broken—but with enough self-help books, you can break anything you want. This ebook features an illustrated biography of Erma Bombeck including rare images and never-before-seen documents from the author’s estate.

Just Wait Till You Have Children of Your Own

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Fawcett
ISBN: 0307778231
Release Date: 2011-03-30
Genre: Humor

"She goes a long way with her book to prove that humor is the best -- possibly the only -- way to keep the world on an even keel." CHICAGO SUN-TIMES Remember the things Mother used to say? Erma Bombeck remembers them all and now she's using them on her own kids! With clever illustrations by Bob Keane, these really funny, too-true observations on family and kids and why it shouldn't work but does, is a wonderful antitdote to the daily problems and crises that every family faces. With Erma Bombeck in your corner, laughter is the best coach you can have....

Eat Less Cottage Cheese and More Ice Cream

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 9780740787584
Release Date: 2009-01-01
Genre: Humor

Even after her death, Erma Bombeck remains one of America's best-loved writers of all time. Eat Less Cottage and More Ice Cream is based on one of her most requested columns. In 1979, someone asked humorist Erma Bombeck, "If you had your life to live over, would you change anything?" Her immediate answer was no, but once she thought about it, she changed her mind. The result was a classic column full of Bombeck's signature wit and warmth. Now the beloved column that has hung on hundreds of refrigerator doors has been cheerily illustrated and designed as a handsome gift book, Eat Less Cottage and More Ice Cream. In it, Bombeck gently reminds us of what is really important in life: "If I had my life to live over again I would have waxed less and listened more." I would have cried and laughed less while watching television . . . and more while watching real life." But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute of it . . . look at it and really see it . . . try it on . . . live it . . . exhaust it . . . and never give that minute back until there was nothing left of it. . . . " Long-time fans of Erma Bombeck will be thrilled to have this favorite column in the form of a beautiful keepsake. Readers discovering Bombeck for the first time will become fans instantly. Eat Less Cottage and More Ice Cream offers wisdom to inspire all of us.

Forever Erma

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 9781453290095
Release Date: 2013-01-15
Genre: Humor

New York Times Bestseller: This anthology of Erma Bombeck’s most memorable and humorous essays is a tribute to one of America’s sharpest wits. When she began writing her regular newspaper column in 1965, Erma Bombeck’s goal was to make housewives laugh. Thirty years later, she had published more than four thousand columns, and earned countless laughs—from housewives, presidents, and everyone in between. With grace, good humor, and razor-sharp prose, she gently skewered every aspect of the American family. This collection holds the best of her columns—not just her famous quips, but also the heartbreaking observations that gave her writing such weight. In 1969, Erma wrote: “screaming kids, unpaid bills, green leftovers, husbands behind newspapers, basketballs in the bathroom. They’re real . . . they’re warm . . . they’re the only bit of normalcy left in this cockeyed world, and I’m going to cling to it like life itself.” With what Publishers Weekly calls her “infectious sense of human absurdity,” Erma Bombeck’s writing remains a timeless examination of the still-cockeyed world. This ebook features an illustrated biography of Erma Bombeck including rare images and never-before-seen documents from the author’s estate.

Motherhood

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 9781453290088
Release Date: 2013-01-15
Genre: Humor

A look at one of the toughest jobs on earth, from the woman who perfectly captures life’s humor and heart Anyone who thinks motherhood is easy has never had children. To care for children, a husband, and oneself is a superhuman task, and any woman who appears to be expert at doing all three simultaneously is not Supermom—she’s a good actress. For three decades, Erma Bombeck chronicled motherhood’s daily frustrations and victories. In this classic anthology, she presents all sorts of mothers, and even a stay-at-home dad, on good days and bad. With hilarious anecdotes and deep compassion, she shows that there is no other profession that demands so much, and rewards so highly. This ebook features an illustrated biography of Erma Bombeck including rare images and never-before-seen documents from the author’s estate.

Motherhood

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 9781453290088
Release Date: 2013-01-15
Genre: Humor

A look at one of the toughest jobs on earth, from the woman who perfectly captures life’s humor and heart Anyone who thinks motherhood is easy has never had children. To care for children, a husband, and oneself is a superhuman task, and any woman who appears to be expert at doing all three simultaneously is not Supermom—she’s a good actress. For three decades, Erma Bombeck chronicled motherhood’s daily frustrations and victories. In this classic anthology, she presents all sorts of mothers, and even a stay-at-home dad, on good days and bad. With hilarious anecdotes and deep compassion, she shows that there is no other profession that demands so much, and rewards so highly. This ebook features an illustrated biography of Erma Bombeck including rare images and never-before-seen documents from the author’s estate.

Sober Dad

Author: Michael Graubart
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 9781616497002
Release Date: 2017-03-07
Genre: Family & Relationships

Admit it. You’ve been looking for that once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to show everyone the great man you know you are. Well, congratulations. That moment is here. You are a parent (or you’re about to become one). A father! A sober dad. If the word sober led you to pick up this book, you are on the right track. You know you want to be a sober dad. Physically sober. Emotionally sober. Here’s your guide to giving up being a “guy” and to becoming a better man, so that you become a better dad. You aren’t going to get everything right. Everything isn’t going to be perfect. Perfectly imperfect is okay. Your role as a dad will last a lifetime. You’ll soon see that perfection isn’t the point. Showing up, being present, getting up, and trying again with your eyes wide open and crystal clear—that’s what counts. That’s what separates the guys from the sober dads. Those are the things your kids will remember.

When God Created Mothers

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 9780740787775
Release Date: 2009-01-01
Genre: Family & Relationships

Erma Bombeck remains one of America's favorite humorists. When God Created Mothers republishes one of her most popular Mother's Day columns as an illustrated keepsake book that offers a touching description of all the characteristics a mother must possess. When it first appeared in Erma Bombeck's Mother's Day column in 1974, When God Created Mothers was an instant success, clipped from newspapers, tucked into purses, and tacked onto refrigerators all over America. Now in this beautiful keepsake edition, Bombeck's moving words are paired with original art that bring to life the warm portrait of motherhood contained within. An angel marvels at the detail and overtime that the good Lord is putting into his creation of mothers. Despite the six pairs of hands and the three pairs of eyes that every mother needs, the angel thinks she has discovered a flaw: "There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told you that you were trying to put too much into this model." "It's not a leak," said the Lord. "It's a tear." "What's it for?" "It's for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain, loneliness and pride." "You are a genius," said the angel. The Lord looked somber, "I didn't put it there." Every mother will treasure this moving tribute, penned by America's most beloved expert on motherhood.

Encyclopedia of American Humorists

Author: Steven H. Gale
Publisher: Routledge
ISBN: 9781317362265
Release Date: 2016-04-14
Genre: Humor

First published in 1988, this book contains entries on famous American Humorists. Humor has been present in American literature, from the beginning, and has developed characteristics that reflect the American character, both regional and national. Although American literature was, in the past, treated as inferior to British literature, there has always been a large popular audience for the genre, which this book shows. The figures with entries in this encyclopedia not only amuse in their writing, but also aim to enlighten- setting out to expose the foibles and foolishness of society and the individuals who compose it. It is the manner in which these authors try to accomplish this end that determines whether they appear in the volume. Indeed, the book will demonstrate that the best humor has at its base, a ready understanding of human nature.